Does he have commitment phobia?

If your boyfriend has commitment phobia it’s vital for you to learn about it as soon as possible.

Fortunately, with the following tips, you won’t have to stay in the dark for too long. You will see that there are several ways for you to find out if he has commitment phobia or not.

The first thing you should do is watch out and listen for helpful hints whenever you have a conversation about your relationship.

Though it often goes unnoticed, a lot of information can slip out during a conversation. Arguments in particular are loaded with clues and signs.

There are many other sources of information too that will give you some helpful clues, particularly if you

Ask the right questions!

With that in mind, here are some leading questions to ask yourself.

Not only will they alert you to several warning signs of commitment phobia; they will also help you to think objectively about the direction your relationship is taking.

Does he have commitment Phobia?

10 Questions to ask yourself

• Does your boyfriend often say that he doesn’t want to get married or that he cannot see himself settling down with one woman?  If so, this is not a mere hint.  It’s a red flag.

•  Does he often tell you that he has to do a lot of traveling for his work? Or does he often say that his work requires him to work late at the office? Another warning sign!

• Does he seem to make a habit of choosing to play or watch an unusual amount of sport that keeps you apart?

• Does he often choose to go out with “the boys” to places where you are not included?

• Does he have a long list of short relationships?  Because if he has, yours may be the very next one to join his list.

• If he keeps mentioning that he needs his space, take it seriously as another sign that he is not thinking about his commitment to you.

• Also take note if he starts to complain that you are too demanding without being sufficiently specific. But make sure that he doesn’t have a genuine case against you before you are tempted to accuse him of being unfair.

• And here’s a tricky one: If he says that he needs to make changes in his life so that he can get away from it all, can you be quite sure that he isn’t trying to get away from you?

• Does he make excuses about introducing you to his parents or does he keep putting it off?

• And finally, if he keeps hinting that he isn’t sure if things are going to work out between you – take it as a sign that commitment to you is not on his immediate horizon!

If you have answered these questions as honestly and as objectively as possible, you will have a good idea about your boyfriend’s commitment to you.

And here’s The Answer to commitment Phobia

How to get that Ring

Amazing! A short while after writing this post I  discovered this brand new guide to getting your boyfriend to commit.

So I am adding it here for your convenience.

Take a look and see if it could be the answer to your problems.    I think it may just do the trick for you.

It’s worth trying in my opinion because clearly there is a lot to  gain from it.

The answer to commitment phobia

Aff link

The holiday season can be the loneliest time of the year.

While everyone around you seems to be buying presents, preparing meals and going to dinners and parties, you feel like a lonely wallflower sitting on the sidelines watching all the dancers whirl by.

When you are feeling alone it rubs salt into the wound to see so much activity and so much shopping and scurrying around.

Your only wish is that it will all go away as quickly as possible.

What are you to feel when the whole world around you seems to be going berserk? Your loneliness is accentuated by all this contrast with your own situation.

So you pretend to be bright and happy. But in reality you are feeling like the only person on the planet who feels miserable and so desperately alone.

But take heart. There are many thousands of people right now who feel exactly as you do.  The only difference is that you haven’t met them and you don’t know who they are. If somehow you could all get together you could have one huge bash that would put all the other party-goers to shame!

But jokes aside, holiday seasons are notorious for making people feel miserable. There are many people out there right now who can’t wait for the holidays to be over so that they can get back to work quickly and regain some semblance of normality.

The important thing to realize is that you are not alone. Many, many people are going through this very same feeling of depression this minute.

The secret lies in learning how to cope with feeling lonely. And this means that you have to make a plan of action.

It’s quite easy.  Simply accept that this is the time to pamper yourself.  Buy that special something you have always wanted.  Treat yourself to something you know you will enjoy.

Buy that new book you have always wanted or make plans to learn that new hobby you’ve always fancied; or explore an interest that you have always wanted to follow such as learn handwriting analysis. Immerse yourself in it and you will be amazed to see how quickly the time passes and how soon you will start to feel better about yourself.

Time to yourself can be a blessing in this overcrowded world. Use the opportunity to get in touch with your creativity. Express your feelings by painting, writing or learning a musical instrument.

And there’s the internet too with chat groups where you can join groups of people with similar interests. Loneliness is a common problem and there are many people out there hoping to connect with others who have similar interests.

Now that you have some time on your hands you can get involved with a cause that you believe in. There is a double advantage here.  You’ll feel good knowing you are doing something worthwhile and furthermore, you may meet some like-minded people who could add a lot of meaning to your life.

For example if you are concerned about the ecology you could become part of a group and go on outdoor excursions. There are all kinds of possibilities for new experiences.

The bottom line is – don’t simply hide under your bed till the holidays are over. With a little change of focus you can turn this time into a valuable and yes, an enjoyable experience. Just set your mind to it.

Conflict in your relationship

But while this is the unfortunate lot of many couples today, the good news is that it doesn’t have to be that way.

It doesn’t have to signify the end of a beautiful friendship.

You can change the direction your relationship is taking. Because the path it follows is largely guided by the way you handle conflict.

Interestingly, how you manage conflict is an important sign of the health and resilience of your relationship. At the same time it reveals a lot about your personalities too.

The problem is that most of us don’t really know how we react to conflict.  We become so emotionally involved that we are unable to see ourselves objectively. Clearly we never see ourselves in action!

That’s why it’s helpful to know a little more about ourselves and our reactions when conflict strikes.  Because strike it will!

Here are a few questions and suggestions about arguing

• Do you sulk silently or do you rant and rave? If you tend to remain silent and introverted while your partner rants and raves you are clearly on separate pages emotionally.

• At some point in the argument do you say “you always …?” Remember not to generalize but rather keep the argument specific.  When you start to bring in general complaints from last year, the argument broadens and gets out of hand.

• Do you forgive your partner readily and easily? And are you willing to make up quickly? Or do you bear grudges and carry them around with you in a mental “grudge basket?” A grudge basket is a convenient receptacle for holding grudges till you need to take them out to use during a disagreement!

The ideal way to deal with an issue is to discuss it when you are both calm and relaxed.

But as you know, we are seldom calm and relaxed when it comes to emotional matters. Most of us need a little help now and then.

In cases like this I find that a careful look at a couple’s handwriting can be effective because it can often help to isolate the cause of the problem.

I’m not suggesting that you shouldn’t consult a professional where necessary.  What I am saying is that an understanding of both your personalities will give you a better understanding of your relationship.

If a scrutiny of your handwriting can do anything at all, it certainly does one thing well. It helps you to understand where you are coming from.

Not only that, it helps you to identify areas of conflict based on the evidence obtained from both handwritings.  It’s even possible to anticipate where friction is likely to occur in the future.

And no, this does not mean consulting a crystal ball.  This information comes purely from the handwriting itself which holds the clues to many personality quirks and idiosyncrasies as well as to certain emotional problems.

So conflict in your relationship needn’t mean the end of everything. If you can find out what makes you both tick, it can actually add a new dimension of understanding to your relationship.

And don’t forget; a conflict resolved is a relationship strengthened.

See Relationship Secrets

To find out more about your personality and your handwriting you can get the (free) Graphology Review here:

All these reasons large and small are mostly the result of personality differences.

But things get even more complicated when you have an argument.

Because when you have an argument, there is always a stated reason and a hidden reason.  A quarrel is rarely based on the stated reason alone. That’s just a cover for a deeper problem.

The real problem is usually based on a hidden reason.  So this is where you should be looking if you want real and relevant answers.

The Hidden Reason

Of course, the big challenge is – how do you find the hidden reason?

This is where it gets really interesting.  But take a deep breath first!

Ready?

Your handwriting holds the clues!

And guess what?

When you compare both of your handwritings you get to look into the inner workings of your relationships – behind the scenes.

This is How it Works.

In the same way that we express our feelings by making facial and body movements, handwriting is an expression of our moods and emotions. The difference is that the movement is captured on paper.  It’s like a photograph of your emotions.

Think of an electrocardiogram that captures the pattern of your heartbeat on paper.  Well, your handwriting is a living trail of evidence that you leave on paper as you write. Of course it’s all unconscious.

But technicalities aside, the important thing for you is that your handwriting and the handwriting of your partner holds clues that will help you to understand your personalities.

As you compare the handwritings you start to get a picture of the health of your relationship. The problems pop out, you can see what caused them and of course it’s so much easier to come up with solutions to sort them out.

Obviously you can’t do this alone – you’ll need the help of an expert handwriting analyst or graphologist.

Well you can relax! Help is at hand in the form of a detailed guide that you can access immediately.

Relationship Secrets shows you exactly how to get an expert understanding of your relationship by comparing your handwritings.

You don’t have to be a handwriting analyst yourself. The book explains everything in an easy and entertaining way.

To find out more go to Relationship Secrets .

It can be difficult to apologize

Do you have a problem apologizing? Are you the type of person who hates to say; “I’m sorry ?”

Do you sometimes feel that your life would be better if only you could learn to apologize at those emotional crossroads and really mean it?

Well you’re not alone. Most people have trouble apologizing and many find it one of the most difficult things to do. Some people have such a problem with it that they are completely unable to apologize altogether.

The truth is that learning how to apologize in a relationship is one of the most important things to get right. Unfortunately very few people know how to do it correctly.

Why relationships fail

The inability to apologize in an argument is what causes many a conflict to go on for an unnecessarily long time.  It makes the problem linger and it stops the healing process.  It is also often the reason why relationships fail.

Just think how dreadful it makes you feel when you know that you have been at fault but are unable to admit it.  You realize that your relationship is going to suffer and that there could be lasting repercussions but your pride gets in the way and you simply cannot bring yourself to admit that you were wrong.

You understand intellectually that this is an important thing to get right. But emotionally you can’t bring yourself to say those difficult words “I’m sorry!”

Somehow, it’s so much easier to take the opposite route and allow yourself to feel victimized.  In other words, why do you have to spend half your life apologizing for some misdemeanour or other?

Well, the fact is that you know you’ll have to learn how at some time in your life. And the good news is that apologizing can be surprisingly easy. Many people have found that the inability to apologize is simply a bad habit that can be broken.

It isn’t difficult to learn.   Like all bad habits it only needs a little practice to get it right.

Bluffing won’t work!

However, it’s important to remember that bluffing your way through it won’t work.  You have to be sincere about it. That is the most difficult part. Because you have to make sure that your partner gets the message clearly that you really are contrite.

But at all times, bear in mind that you don’t have to grovel or demean yourself in order to apologize.  If you are not in the wrong and you are sure about it, there should be no pretences. Sometimes righteous anger is justified.

You should only feel that you need to apologize when you realize that you are in the wrong.

The best way to learn how to apologize is to put yourself in your partners place.  Try to reverse your roles and see how it makes you feel. And if you can genuinely see where you are at fault you will appreciate how your partner must be feeling.

Once you have mentally switched roles it will make a genuine apology much easier.  Remember that it takes a little practice and that the first time will be the most difficult.

The best way to disarm someone in an argument is to apologize sincerely and then watch what happens.

The effect of an apology can be miraculous.

Anger will seem to dissipate in a puff of smoke. The cloud hanging above your relationship will simply evaporate.  Your partner will be completely disarmed and you will probably end up hugging one another.

All you need to do is try it out.  Make a conscious attempt because apologizing is a real conflict breaker. It’s really not all that complicated or difficult to do once you have made up your mind to try it.

Instead of holding on to an argument and allowing grudges to grow,  just think about how it’s in your hands to get your relationship back on track.  And the best part is that it can work in next to no time.

Don’t let apology phobia ruin a perfectly good relationship. Learning how to apologize can help you  experience the magic of making up.

A relationship that has gone wrong can throw your whole life out of balance and your whole world out of focus. You will probably feel that everything is going wrong at the same time.

When our feelings are hurt we feel vulnerable. We lose our objectivity and our powers of judgement all at the same time.

We can hardly expect to fathom the deep down causes of our problems when our emotions are in turmoil. Only bionic vision could help us to see inside our conflict-filled relationships.

Wouldn’t it be wonderful if we could observe our relationships impartially and get a true picture of what really was going on inside?

Impossible? Not entirely.

You see, there is a way to look into the inner workings of your relationship where you can see it clearly and impartially. (To be continued)!