We use all sorts of ploys and subterfuges to try to hide how we truly feel.

We control our facial expressions; we hide our hands behind our backs and we change our voices. In short, we will try anything to conceal any gesture that could possibly suggest how we really feel.

And so we laugh when we feel embarrassed.  We pretend indifference when we are moved. We hide our tears when we are sad. And we even smile when we are hopping mad!

The face behind the Mask

We’re all so scared of being ridiculed or humiliated that saving face has become an end in itself.  Image is so important that we have to protect it all costs.

Why do we feel it necessary to hide our feelings behind a mask of indifference? What is it that makes us want to pretend?

Isn’t it possible that the real problem with showing our emotions is that it could make us seem vulnerable?

And so, if we are feeling an emotion – any emotion at all, we disguise it in case it reveals sensitivity or vulnerability. Because we often mistake vulnerability for weakness.

Strange that we are all so bent on hiding the sensitivity that reveals our humaneness.  After all, aren’t our feelings the very things that make us truly human?

If you liked this post you may find the following article interesting:

How to unmask “the face behind the Mask” with handwriting

If you are interested in a seeing a light-hearted approach to graphology with lots of handwriting fun for beginners go to Graphology-World.

It’s important to realize that your personality is the key to your relationships and if you constantly afflict your personality with disempowering beliefs, your relationships will bear the brunt of all the abuse you heap upon yourself.

Photo: John Suder. Flickr

Low self esteem makes you self-destruct every time so that you act as if you are not worthy to be loved. You even feel that you are not good enough to be in a fulfilling relationship.

You have probably repeated this to yourself over and over again to the extent that you are now convinced and have it firmly set in your mind that you are simply not good enough.

You should never ever run yourself down – not even to yourself.  It isn’t humility or modesty.  So don’t mistake it for these.  Not only will people believe your unflattering comments about yourself but you will start to believe them yourself.  And you  do realize don’t you that this will act as a self-fulfilling prophecy?

It really doesn’t have to be like this.  You have it in your own hands to change.

People with low self esteem are not weak people.

They can rise to the occasion when the situation demands. But there is one big secret that they have in common and it is this.  They have to be highly motivated to do the extraordinary.  Strong motivation can make them scale mountains.

Susan Boyle did it and look how it changed her life. She never thought much of herself but she went out there – accepted the great challenge that her mother had so badly wanted her to take – and the rest is history. She walked onto the stage a poor, lonely woman that the audience was prepared to laugh at – and she walked off the stage a celebrity!

Many people have turned their lives around by simply accepting a challenge.

You can do the same. Your greatest challenge is to try to see yourself in a more positive light.

If your relationship is sufficiently important to you, you will realize that you need to change your self-perception. Before you can expect your partner to believe in you, you will have to believe in yourself first.

The fact is that it’s really not all that complicated or difficult to do.

Instead of repeating to yourself over and over how inferior you are, just think about the positive things you have achieved and how you can use your strengths to do it again.

Every time you think a negative thought about yourself, change it around and think of your best personality strengths. Let this become a habit. And slowly you’ll find your attitude changing for the better.

As you banish low self esteem you’ll find that others will take their cue from you and show you more respect too. Best of all, your new positive approach will flow over into your relationship.