I often cringe when I hear someone say “I can’t help being so fussy – I’m a perfectionist.”
Quite honestly perfectionism can be a recipe for disaster. Being a perfectionist doesn’t make you or your efforts perfect. It can have the opposite effect.
Perfectionism squeezes the fun out of life by making you try too hard. If you are a perfectionist you tend to try so hard that you lose out when it comes to spontaneity and carefree enjoyment. And the harder you try the further away you set your goals.
A problem particularly relevant to your relationships is that perfectionism can be a two-edged sword. Two-edged because as a perfectionist you are not only demanding of yourself – you are demanding of others as well.
It’s all very well to be hard on yourself – which is an issue in itself with a whole lot of repercussions. But it can create problems if you are too hard on your partner as well.
You can’t expect others to toe the line in the same way that you do. You have to give people breathing space. A relationship that is stifled and sterile has nowhere to go.
It’s worthwhile remembering that even Nature isn’t perfect. But she is bountiful, generous and joyful. Sometimes even a little chaotic! In fact, there is a certain beauty in irregularity.
We can’t all be thin, beautiful and perfect. But we can be happy and joyful. And sometimes a bit of a mess can be jolly good fun!
To see if you are a perfectionist or even if you have perfectionist leanings, there is no better way than to take a quick look at your handwriting. Perfectionism in handwriting is quite easy to identify.